nANIMOv

I met a friend of a friend this past weekend. Super nice fella who got some of my more obscure references. It was super early in the morning ’cause the three of us were checking out the sunrise. I was in a beanie, sweats, and wrapped in a large Iron Man blanket. To me it’s funny that when you meet someone for the first time wearing a hat, they have no idea what your hair looks like, and that there’s a chance they have constructed their own idea of what your hair looks like based on how you are dressed and how you behave. I’m curious what he thought my hair looked like.

**Again spoilers ahead; venture no further ye who hath yet belaiden thine eyes upon GoT 73.**

Over the past few days since the series finale of Game of Thrones I’ve had a chance to hear different perspectives on what just went down. Here’s where I land:

This season left me feeling somewhat dissatisfied, but I don’t think that makes how it ended bad. I can’t help but feel that way and I think that might have been the intention of the writers. Some people seemed shocked about some of the things that happened, but to me nothing was completely out of the blue. This is GoT, not a fairytale, not everyone is going to get their happy ending or their deserved demise. That scene when the “royal council” (Tyrion, Bronn, Sam, etc.) are discussing matters of the kingdom, while perhaps confusing and somewhat comical, was a nudge at “life goes on,” this apparent triviality of everything that had transpired. Events that were once huge tipping points on the scale of humanity just become stories like all events before. I said before that this season felt rushed, and I still feel that way, BUT I do think that if you watched all of GoT beginning to end without have to wait so long between seasons (especially between the last two) if would feel much better.

Anyways, that’s all I really have to say, but if you have any ideas/ opinions or want to discuss specific events/ scenes/ characters/ arcs, my DMs are always open.

I was listening to Conan’s podcast the other day with Howard Stern as the guest. It was a longer episode, but I really enjoyed it. Not because it was particularly funny, but because I thought they talk about some interesting things… they got real. With some of his guests all they talk about is SNL and can get pretty “meh.” Howard Stern has always been someone I didn’t know much about but felt like I was trained not to like, but listening to him on the podcast I feel like I would enjoy listening to his stuff. Anyways, Conan and Howard talked about this feeling of being out of place; feeling like you shouldn’t be where you are at, like you get false accolades. And while I am nowhere near either of their stature I feel that sometimes (on a relative scale). People will pay me compliments sometimes or will say nice things about how I’m smart or funny or whatever, but most of the time I don’t feel that way. I’m no different than everyone else and I think most people see that. Maybe there are times where I try harder, but that because I’m a strong believer in the idea that pretty much all people are capable of achieving the same potential, but there are also time when I probably try less than I should.

Abortion has been a hot topic lately, and I know nobody asked for it, but here’s my thoughts:

We need to make sure that women have access to safe and legal abortions. From a medical standpoint, as many of my friends who work in medicine have mentioned, abortions are going to happen ban or no ban, so why not make sure they are safe. However, this debate goes beyond evidence and facts because your stance on the issue depends on what you believe. If you believe life begins at conception, then abortion is murder. To that point though, I think this post by Methodist pastor, Dave Barnhart pretty much covers it. Ok, sure you can advocate for the unborn if you want. If you believe an individual’s life begins at conception, that’s yours to believe. But if you do, you should also be advocating just as hard for all the other lives that are threatened. Every day people are dying in the streets, abandoned and alone, but the there’s no outrage over that, barely a fuss.

We love passing judgement on those who are already born. Once you are born you have agency over your life and therefore if things aren’t going great, it’s your own damn fault. On one hand passing judgement on other people seems like a very human thing to do. We evaluate others’ actions and determine whether they are in-line with our own personal codes, values, and philosophies. At its core judgement is a form of kindness. Each individuals lives are certain way because they believe it to be “good” and they want others to live similarly. People want to guide others, their kids, their friends, their community in that “good” direction.

Where things fall apart is when that desire to guide others becomes a desire to control. I don’t think any one person knows or even can know with absolute certainty what is ultimately “good.” And while I do thing we should strive towards some moral standard, it is not our place to force that standard upon anyone. We have laws to protect rights that we “collectively” agree should be granted to every human being, the inalienable rights. I believe strongly that among those inalienable rights is the right make your own choices, regardless of sex, gender, race, or creed. We should live our lives with love and compassion, and leave the judgement to God or whatever gods may be.

I only want to laugh, the way you make me laugh.

I only want to cry, the way you make me cry.

I only want to go, with your hand in mine.

I only want to dream, the with you on my mind.

I only want to feel, the way you make me feel.

Because that’s how I know it’s love.

Nothing is a sure thing. Life in the present is hard ’cause you never know what’s going to happen next. You can make predictions and act based on data and evidence we’ve collected, and live in almost-certainty, but that’s the best we will ever be able to do. The question is do we gamble on the uncertainty or stick with safe-bets; do we risk it all on the big payoff or do we shield ourselves from the pain of loss and of failure. What algorithm do I follow?

It’s easy to let our emotions consume our productivity. When something is on your mind that is affecting you emotionally, it’s hard to let it go. What’s the best way to deal with that? Head-on confrontation? Suppression? Distraction? Feel like they all have pretty glaring drawbacks. Time, as they say, heals all wounds, which is true, but good hygiene, nutrition, and clean dressings definitely facilitate that process.

I’ve always like sunrise more than sunset. It’s not so much that I think that they’re prettier, it’s more about the way they make me feel. During sunrise, you still have a whole day ahead of you. There’s this optimism that things are going only going to get better. The day is just beginning, and you are going to make it the best one yet.

**WARNING GoT SPOILERS AHEAD, DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT $200**

Season 8 of Game of Thrones pretty bizarre. I feel like it’s rushing through (or completely throwing out the window) the storylines of all the characters and arcs that we care about most, in ways that are neither satisfying or justified. Not going to go into every episode of the season so far; I’m gonna focus on this week’s Episode 5. I’ve been hearing a lot of people saying this was a terrible episode yada yada, but I think most of that comes from what seemed like unfitting ends to some of the most odious characters in the series, as well as the failure of the series’s most beloved. The deaths of Cersei, Qyburn, the Mountain, and Euron, were all so lackluster, especially given the show’s history of dramatic deaths. The failures of Dany and of Jaime to maintain who they have become over the past 7 seasons, left a bad taste in my mouth.

Yes I was looking forward to a badass dragon scene, but not 28 shots a dragon decimating building and people. It feels like the writers are set on a specific ending and can see the finish line, and are just trying to get to there with no regard for how they get there.

BUT to play devil’s advocate, I could see that perhaps they didn’t want to give the crowd pleaser deaths and heroic finales because that would be too idealistic. Power corrupts, even those who we believe to be good in heart and intentions. Humans are fallible and can only be pushed so far, after all Dany did lose Viserion, Rhaegal, Jorah, and Missandei in the span of weeks, if that (not super clear on the timeline, so correct me if I’m wrong), and was also betrayed in her eyes by the person she loves most and the people she trusted most. Maybe Dany is going to end up giving up the throne to Jon after realizing what she’s done. Maybe a giant comet will hit Westeros and destroy everything. Who knows.

I’m not a film and tv expert, or an expert on anything for that matter. Maybe this was the greatest set-up for the greatest ending the world has ever seen. All I know is right now I’m not happy and don’t see a way for things to end satisfyingly… and like Varys (RIP), I hope I’m wrong.

There’s a little boy who comes to the museum a lot with his mom and two little brothers. He’s super curious and loves engaging with all the exhibits. His favorite question, like many kids his age is, “Why?” Whatever the situation, that is his go-to. The incessant whys sometimes can be frustrating, and I can only imagine what his mother goes through, but then I started to think about why whys frustrate people so much. I think part of it is a sense of futility; that if one could explained why, he wouldn’t fully understand at the time. And the other part of it is a sense of pride; people don’t like being questioned. Both of which are stupid reasons to be frustrated about a question.

At that age, and throughout adolescence, asking why seems to often be perceived as disrespect. Asking why is considered talking-back rather than just doing as you’re told. To me this is kind of messed up, and perhaps stems from culture and from personal insecurity. If a child is genuinely asking why something is the way it is or why they are being asked to do something, I think they should get an answer. Shutting down their “why” is shutting down their curiosity; its telling them to accept things the way they are, because that the way it is.

Yes there probably is a point where “why” becomes a real talking-back tool, but I think a genuine “why” is pretty easy to distinguish. And obviously working/ dealing with children is not as simple as that, there are a bajillion other things to consider, (e.g. time constraints, cognitive ability, psychology, etc.) but I think we owe it to their future, and to our own, to support curiosity whenever possible.