Mitote is a concept I was introduced to in Miguel Ruiz’s The Four Agreements. It’s been a while since I read the book, but from what I remember he describes it almost like a haze that clouds the mind, or like an unintelligible chattering of voices. I’ve been feeling a lot of that recently. I think it has something to do with this change in scenery. I have less distractions out here, which seems like a good thing if I can take advantage of it. That also means there are fewer mindless activities to default to when I get bored (I haven’t set up my desktop, so no video games), and so I think my mind doesn’t know what to do with itself. I find myself picking up my phone more often, just to glimpse and then put it down, or reopening YouTube or Facebook on my laptop just minutes after I just closed the tabs.

At the same time, I feel like I’m being pulled in a bunch of different directions by all the things that I need to do, or want to do, or feel like I should do. This is held in contrast to my weekdays when I have a very clear direction in my clinical encounters. It feels clear to me that I don’t actually have an issue focusing when I have a clear and specific objective, so in the absence of that I need to take advantage of my environment, some self-awareness, and maybe some creativity to help clear the mitote.

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