So yesterday I found out I got waitlisted at the last school I was waiting to hear back from for medical school, which means as of this moment I will not be attending medical school next fall. Of course I’m disappointed and part of me can’t help but take it personally and feel insecure. However, another part of me is curious, motivated, and excited.
I don’t want to say I wasn’t ready to start medical school because I was, but also part of me wasn’t (confusing, I know). That part that wasn’t has nothing to do with my grades or my commitment to medicine. There’s just so much else I want to do and explore before I start. Medical school is a long journey and once you start there’s not really any stopping, and once you’re done, it can be hard to have time for other things.
I’m not saying that me not getting in this year is fate or that I’m glad that I didn’t get in; I put a lot of work into my applications and I felt like I rocked my interviews, and so it still sucks to feel like my best wasn’t good enough. But moping isn’t gonna do me any good. I need to see what parts need strengthening and try to fix that. While I do that, I want to continue doing work that I think is meaningful which also might mean shaking things up a bit.
The best is yet to come, stay tuned.